yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
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