We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
i believe in u and ur pee
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