I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Randomize
