My sheets look like a crime scene.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize