i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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