Apparently last night I sat at the bar with an upside down sharpie lightning bolt on my forehead, yelling "It's Harry Potter's birthday! Let me be on the qudditch team!" And I kept calling the bartender Dobby. There are videos.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
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