Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize