why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Blame the bisexuality and move on?