Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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