"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
operation harelip BJ is a go
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
He called his prostate his "boner button".
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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