How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
