I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
I had to cum in my sink.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
