he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
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