maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Randomize
