so explain again why im purple
no
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
