there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
no. you can't hotbox the world.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.