i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
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Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
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we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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