hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots