is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
23 “Girl Codes” Guys Probably Don’t Know About
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
19 People Did The Wildest Things When They Were Black-Out Drunk
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.