bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
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