My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her