I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
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i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
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Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics