Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
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