mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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