I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
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