nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
I was not drunk enough for that final.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
