i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
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