do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
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The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
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I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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