You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half