I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
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