did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
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just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
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Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts