Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick