I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
Randomize
