I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
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