i can't believe i had my finger in that
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
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