sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.