if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
She announced her abortion via fbk
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in itâ€
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
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