I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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