Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
These Are The 21 Strangest Sexual Fantasy Confessions
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
my liver is dry heaving
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.