Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
no more duck duck goose at the bar
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
In other news, I just burned my penis
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
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