so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
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I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
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Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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