i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
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