I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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