my computer doesn't work...
i puked on it last night
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
23 People Confess Why They Don’t Talk To Their Best Friend Anymore
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
These 17 Delivery Dudes Suck At Their Jobs But Are Winning At Life
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records