My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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