how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
should my penis look like a turkey
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back