uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Alive.
So much puke
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
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