im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
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