i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize