have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think your dad took our porno
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
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