I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk